Confessions!
by varsha.castle
Summary: Confessions that both Castle and Beckett need to tell each other to save themselves... Reviews are appreciated.. I don't own Castle!


He stood in front of her door. Thinking should he be here or no. He looked at his watch; it showed 12:14 am. He could hear the song she was listening. He waited for a while till he gathered all the courage he had and knocked the door.

Kate was stunned to hear the knock at this time of the night. She looked at the clock. It was 1 am. Then she picked herself from the couch and moved towards the door. She was in shock to see Richard Castle standing on the other side of the door.

She opened the door. She was wearing only a t-shirt that covered her thighs. He stared at her milky white legs. She then realized why he was staring.

"Castle what are you doing here?" she asked him, as she moved away from the door, asking him to come in. He looked into her eyes and lost in it. With a lot of hesitation he broke the eye contact and pulled her into his hug. She felt her heart skip a beat. She felt so small and safe in his arms.

She knew something was bothering him. Something that was killing him. He seemed distant from past few days.

She slowly raised her head from this chest and looked into his eyes. "Talk to me Rick, please talk to me" she whispered. That much was enough for him to break into tears. She got worried and scared. "Rick, please tell me what's wrong? Are Alexis and Martha alright?"

She waited for his answer. After a few minutes he spoke "I can't do this Kate. I can't pretend anymore that I don't love you". As soon as she heard the word "_**love**_". She froze.

"Rick, I-", he put his finger on her soft lips and said "Please Kate, listen to me for once. Please." She just nodded her head in agreement.

"I had an instant attraction towards you when you walked into the book signing event. I wanted to get into bed with you. But once I started shadowing you, I saw who you really are. How beautiful, stunning, gorgeous, kiss-ass, passionate detective you are. I tried not to fall for you. I really did try. But I don't know how or when I fell in love with you so deeply. Then I saw you with Demming, but still I asked you to come to Hamptons with me. But I overheard Demming and your conversation about vacations. I was heartbroken. By chance, I happen to talk to Gina that night. She too needed company as she had broken up with her boyfriend. So I asked her to come to with me to Hamptons. Just as a friend. Then once the fall was back and you arrested me, I kind of felt happy. I wanted to tell you how much I missed you, I did too. Then Josh came around, I was not my usual self around him in the beginning. But I thought as long as you are happy with him, its fine with me. But the day we were stuck in the freezer, I was terrified. I thought I lost you. But once I opened my eyes, I saw Josh. I couldn't utter a word about my love to you. Later we had this amazing kiss. You might tell it was for distracting the guard. But I don't. I purposely pushed away your hand from the gun. That was the most passionate kiss I've had in my entire life. Then came your mother's case, Roy and your dad, both asked me to stop you from pursuing this case. They knew it would take you away from them. So did I. Roy died protecting you, Kate. In the funeral, when you were shot, I felt I lost my life. I told you that I loved you. I was a coward not to tell you before. Only when the doctors came out of surgery and informed us that you made through the surgery, I relaxed a bit. Then you said you didn't remember what happen after you were shot. You didn't remember what I told. I died inside. Once you recovered and started to work, I was happy that I could shadow you again. But then I learned that you broke-up with Josh. You didn't tell me that yourself. I was sure you didn't want me to know. But now I can't pretend that there is nothing between us. Katherine Beckett I love you. I always had, I always have and I always will."

All he could see was his Kate had tears pouring down her cheeks. He couldn't believe that his words could hurt her. "I'm so sorry Kate, I didn't mean to hurt y-" before he could finish his words, her lips were on his. He froze. Then relaxed. He could felt her soft lips on his. Her hands made their way to his neck. His hands moved to her waist and pulled her closer. Their hands had a mind of their own. The kiss started soft and then it grew with passion. She felt him groan in her mouth. They broke away, not because they wanted to, but because they were out of breath.

After a while, Kate looked his gorgeous blue eyes and said "I love you too Rick. I've always been selfish. I always wanted to play safe. I've loved you, I don't even remember since when. All my life, I never wanted anyone to break the walls that I built in my heart. But you did. Still I didn't tell you that I loved you. I was a coward, not you. But I realized how wrong I was. I couldn't do anything, because I was with Josh. He made me happy but not like you did. You came home to tell me not to pursue my mother's case. I never understood why until today. On Roy's funeral, I had planned to tell you that you mean more than a friend to me. But before I could, I was shot. I wish I could remember your words. I'm really sorry, that I don't. In the hospital you showed how much cared and loved me. I knew at that moment that I've always loved you. I broke up with Josh. But I still didn't have the courage to tell it to you. I'm sorry that you had to go through so much because of me"

He could only smile. He took her hand and kissed it. "You have nothing to be sorry about. The circumstances are to blame, not you or me." He pressed a kiss to her forehead. Her scent sent a shiver down his body.

"Stay with me tonight" she whispered into his chest as she hugged him. "Are you sure?" he asked. "Yes" she sighed.

He slowly picked her up in bridal style and entered her room. He put her on the bed. He changed into his boxers. He fell onto the bed with his Kate. She pulled herself next to his warm body. She placed her head on his bare chest. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her even closer.

As she was falling asleep, she murmured "I love you Rick". He kissed her forehead and replied "I love you too Kate". Both fell into a peaceful sleep with the widest smile on their faces.


End file.
